Jennifer Lopez isn’t like anybody else. And that’s why the home of the 55-year-old New Yorker — an actress, singer, producer and businesswoman, who has an estimated fortune of $150 million, 30 million monthly Spotify listeners, 80 million albums sold, as well as 40 films grossing $3 billion and counting — isn’t like any other house, either.
Her immense infinity pool overlooks tree-lined Beverly Hills from a marble terrace, dotted with white umbrellas. Before entering, you have to walk through the foyer — which is the size of a typical apartment — and underneath its soaring ceilings. You pass the kitchen on the right and the living room on the left. Upon stepping onto the terrace, the artist is waiting patiently, along with a crew of half-a-dozen people. They’re taking care of the lights, chairs, makeup and the artist’s hair, which rises slightly in the cool morning breeze of Los Angeles.
It’s unusual for Lopez to grant long interviews to foreign media outlets, or to host journalists in her home, as she did when she gave an interview to EL PAÍS one Monday in April. Even less so in a context where she continues to be in the spotlight because of her personal affairs: Lopez divorced Ben Affleck eight months ago. But she’s now embarking on an important phase of her life, by going on tour. Despite her extensive 35-year-long career, this is only the fifth time she’s hit the road. It’s also her third solo tour (in 2007, she did one with her then-husband, Marc Anthony; in 2012, with Enrique Iglesias), as well as her first in six years. And, on the Up All Night Tour, Spain is her main market: of the 17 scheduled dates, seven are in the Southern European country.
Lopez confesses that she’s “excited to be back.” However, surprisingly, the tour isn’t the focus of her conversation with EL PAIS. Rather, it’s more about her entire career, her steps forward and how reading, prayer and therapy have helped her focus her life. She feels renewed, after a year that — as she acknowledges — has been very, very tough.
“It’s been a while. I had plans to go on tour last summer and I had to cancel it,” she explains. Her previous tour was set to focus on the album that she made in tribute to her love story with Affleck: she canceled it a month before it began. “I miss the fans. I miss the energy and the love that I get to give. And I miss the love that I receive. I was looking forward to it last summer, so you can imagine how much more excited I am now.”
She admits that performing in Spain (she performed in Madrid in 2012 and in Fuengirola in 2019) is something she’s looking forward to, especially right now. “There are new songs. My show has evolved over the years. There have been different eras that I’ve been through since then. My show is always very energetic, full of dancing and music. Just very high energy. It’s still like that, but there are always stories to tell, things that you learned over the years that come out in your music and your artistry. I’m very excited. I don’t even know exactly what it will be like yet,” she confesses.
Lopez is immersed in rehearsals, which take place in another space next to her house. She explains that a tour like this is “very demanding,” especially with the stage tricks she performs. “I like to make it interesting. I like to do things that push the boundaries for myself,” she says. “And I think that people expect that from me. So, I have to be in very good shape.” At 55, she says she doesn’t feel too far removed from the Lopez who started touring in 2012, in her early-forties. “I’m only getting more comfortable in my own skin as time goes on. And, if I can stay in shape and have the discipline to do that, it’s really enjoyable.” Now, above all, she wants to have fun.
“I’m having a great time. I think, honestly, this is the best time of my life and I think that’s why I’m excited to get out there and share it with everybody. I never want to go out there and not be able to give my best to my fans or to anybody. Every time somebody comes to a JLo show, I want them to go, ‘that was the best show I’ve ever seen.’ That’s my goal. If it’s not that, I don’t want them spending all that money on a ticket,” she admits with a laugh.
Since her first album, Lopez has always spoken about love, “trying to figure it out.” She also adds that there’s new music on the way about this subject. “My records are going to reflect that, too. I have a few songs that I’ve been working on and maybe I’ll debut them soon. And those will be very indicative of what I’m feeling now, which is kind of free.”
I think, honestly, this is the best time of my life and I think that’s why I’m excited to get out there and share it. I never want to go out there and not be able to give my best to my fans ever or to anybody
That freedom, that joy, is evident in her. She remains a superstar, very professional in her responses, but there’s now a sense of liberation, of wanting to enjoy herself and leave the past behind. Especially after her divorce from Affleck, whom she repeatedly called “the love of my life.” The two almost tied the knot 20 years ago, ultimately getting married in the summer of 2022. She doesn’t name him in her conversation with EL PAÍS, but his presence is felt.
“I had a really tough year,” she sighs. “Unexpected things happened. And so, I read a lot of books. I did a lot of self-introspection. I did meditation. I prayed a lot. I wanted to improve my relationship with God. I wanted to kind of really solidify the family unit that is me and my two children, my twins.” The spiritual certainly helped her, but so did the earthly: “Listening to other people who have been through similar experiences or different experiences than you, I think that’s the thing I love most.”
She read a lot. And it healed her. “I read a lot of books on childhood, marriage, relationships, different styles of love, the brain, science… And over the years, I’ve done individual therapy, couples therapy, family therapy. I’ve had everything, I’m always kind of searching,” she explains. “I think it’s all about learning about yourself. It’s all about knowing yourself. You have to be ready for that. And you have to want it. And, even when you want it, it’s hard to change certain things. But you can.”
Lopez wasn’t raised in a cushy world. She’s built a solid career coming from a normal family in the Bronx, a working-class borough in New York. She’s familiar with the real world.
“I’m very aware of all the things that people say and think about me. And that’s okay, because I really do know who I am and I know my heart and my intentions are good and pure. That’s why it’s very easy for me to get up every day and smile and be genuinely happy,” she notes, acknowledging that where she is now “is a beautiful place to be.”
I learned so much about myself, things I had never really stopped to look at, because you’re on this roller-coaster, this ride of life, this carousel… you’re going round and round. And you don’t stop and go, ‘wait, what’s happening? What’s going on here?
The therapy shows. Lopez invested a lot in her marriage to Affleck — including a fictional mini-movie featuring songs from her album and a documentary to portray the process, which cost $20 million from her own pocket — and its end mustn’t have been easy. But she also knows that she’s not alone.
“Everybody goes through hard times in their life. And it’s what you do in those moments that really does define you. Not the relationship, not the man: what defines you is what you’re doing with the experiences that you’re faced with. I take those experiences — whether they’re good or bad — and I bind them,” she explains.
“Over the past year, I really dug deep into what are the patterns that I’ve had and why they happen and what is it about me that’s creating these patterns. And, when I did that, I just learned so much about myself that I had never really stopped to look at, because you’re on this this kind of roller-coaster, this ride of life, this carousel, you’re going round and round… and you don’t stop and go, ‘wait, what’s happening? What’s going on here?’ Not with anybody else — with me. And, when you do that, you’re able to be more self-aware. And that self-awareness is a very empowering thing,” she emphasizes.
“Everybody makes mistakes. There’s not a human being on the planet who’s not going to make a mistake. That’s something I needed to learn. Did you think I was perfect? Did you ever think I would never gonna make a mistake in my life because I’m in the public eye? No, that’s not how it works. I’m not exempt from the human condition [laughs]. I also have to go through things, right? I must make these lessons my own in order to evolve and grow.”
Lopez hasn’t gone through this journey alone. Her twin children — Max and Emme, born from her relationship with Marc Anthony — have also been there. And they’re no longer babies: they just turned 17. She says that they’ll be heading off to college next year, a milestone she’s very excited about. When the perfect storm hit last year — with the self-financed documentary, the canceled tour and, finally, the divorce — she spoke to them.
“I said, ‘I promise you, this is a difficult time, but you’re going to see that I’ll come out the other side stronger and better.’ I promised them that and I did it. And they feel it now. That gives me a great sense of peace in my life,” Lopez explains. “I’m happier that I’m a step further along than I was a year ago, two years ago, three years ago… I’m proud of myself for that and I’m proud that I was able to navigate my children through difficult times, that they’re stronger and better because of it. So, it’s a great time to go out there and dance and sing and have a good time with everybody,” she smiles, referring to the tour. “This is a perfect time. And I think the last perfect time was six years ago,” she says, purposefully omitting the tour she was scheduled to do last year. “I only want to go on tour when we’re going to celebrate. We’re going to have a good time.”
Did you think I was perfect? Did you ever think I would never gonna make a mistake in my life because I’m in the public eye? No, that’s not how it works. I’m not exempt from the human condition
Her children are part of the conversation. She acknowledges her greatest achievement as being that Max and Emme Muñiz know she loves and supports them every step of the way. This makes her swell with pride.
“I was a working mom when they were little. They probably didn’t get as much of me as they wanted, right? Because when you’re a working mom — and so many working moms out there know this — you always have that guilt. ‘I should have been around more. I shouldn’t have left at all. I should’ve just stayed home.’ But they got the experience that they got. And you always do your best as a mom.”
“Looking back on it, it was an amazing experience,” she continues. “And I was glad that I was able to take them around the world. They were on tour with me. They would go to American Idol with me,” she recalls. Lopez was a judge on the TV program from 2011 until 2016.
Now, her professional career is moving in a different direction. She has a remake of Kiss of the Spider Woman pending release. Surprisingly, it’s her first musical, starring three Latinos: herself, Diego Luna and Los Angeles native Tonatiuh. “It’s the best thing. I only want to do musicals,” she laughs. And why not Broadway? “One day, maybe, we’ll see.” She’s also filming a romantic comedy — Office Romance – and is preparing for two more roles, including one with Robert Zemeckis. Lopez will produce all three projects.
“I love to produce. I think it was out of necessity at first, right? Wanting to create more projects, vehicles for myself and others.” That’s why she founded her production company, Nuyorican, a word that blends her origins: New York and Puerto Rico. “The company was really about creating, while the brand was really about Latino projects and stories and actors. We’ve evolved it from there into so much more.”
Lopez was a pioneer in her community. She finds it exciting to see how Latino music has become the predominant genre worldwide. “It’s just a different world now and I’m very happy to have been a part of that.” In film — with a foot on screen since the mid-1980s and starring roles since the 1990s — she was one of the first to push boundaries.
“It was tougher then. When I first started acting, I remember that very clearly. I was being given very stereotypical type of roles. And I really wanted to break out of that. It was one of my goals. I was like, ‘I want to be the girl in the movie who falls in love; I don’t want to be her housekeeper or whatever.’ Those are not the only roles that we can play. I really tried and forced myself into roles and waited for things that allowed me that opportunity,” she recalls
She knows that she’s a pioneer when it comes to asking for parts. “It’s always about breaking the mold, right? And opening up all the things for other people and different types of people to be represented in our films. Because that’s what life is. We want our films and our art to represent life, and you can’t do that by just having it look like one thing.”
Waiting isn’t easy in the life of an actor. It can be maddening. “Sometimes I feel like I’m still waiting for the best roles of my career. And I try to create them with my partners. It’s a good thing, where you have to kind of break it down and let people see you in a certain way, so that they understand that you can do these things.”
When you’re a working mom – and so many working moms out there know this – you always have that guilt. ‘I should have been around more. I shouldn’t have left at all. I should’ve just stayed home.’ But [my kids] got the experience that they got. And you always do your best as a mom
Lopez — who wears makeup, loose pants and a white cotton T-shirt during her interview — has learned a lot. When asked what advice she would give herself, she reflects for a moment.
“I guess the advice I would give myself is what I would give my kids: you have to really understand your worth and value. And don’t let things that other people say affect you. Understand who you are, believe in that. Understand your own power. I’ve learned that over the years. Whereas, when I first started out, I was very easily influenced and affected by other people’s opinions of me. But then, you have kids and go, ‘wait a minute, who cares what they say?’ You learn through them. That would be the advice that I would give myself: other people’s misconceptions of you do not define who you are.”
“And there are so many misconceptions,” she continues. “Obviously, when you’re in the public eye, it’s a whole different game. A lot of people think they know who you are and what you’re like. And they have no idea, really. But you have to know who you are. And I think that’s why I’ve been able to continue in this business without being destroyed by it. Because I do know who I am. And I’m surrounded by a very loving, good group of people, who always remind me of that, too. That’s important. Always make sure you have a good inner circle, made up of people who are true to you, honest with you. Who support you and celebrate your wins and are there when everything falls apart.”
That’s no easy feat, says Lopez: “It’s a journey, like life.”
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